The role of relationships in our creativity

I started watching the show "Chef's Table" today (aka Sunday) and it's left me electrified.Massimo Bottura is a genius. He thinks so far beyond the proverbial "box" he seems to be on a rocket ship circling new universes. He is influenced by so many different forms of artistry, and has a rebellious tendency to flank traditional Italian cuisine as he invents and reinvents and reimagines a new gastronomic world. I should mention I'm a foodie in that I love to eat, I love to cook, I adore trying new foods and restaurants and cuisines. Massimo gets it.What struck me most was him, his creativity. More so than his deconstructed tortellini imaginings and eureka-moment dessert inspirations.His nature is inquisitive and spunky and he touts his wife Lara with opening up his world to New York galleries, contemporary art, and giving him stable support and love allowing him to reach new culinary heights. And that got me to thinking about the role that relationships play in all of our creative endeavors.Every fleeting connecting with a person can fall into the category of a relationship. We have relationships with the family we were born into, those people that surround us in daily life at the coffee shop or on the train, and the family we create with our friends and work colleagues and friends of friends. Or even cousins of friends who may or may not become our life partners. Just saying (insert: personal reference and make your own inferences, my fiancé is my friend's cousin).Relationships shape us as workers and as doers. If we are from an energetic, morning-person filled family we may lead lives that are driven by productivity. If our friend group came together over an intro to art history course that spanned decades of art-related fanaticism, we may find ourselves planning weekends and international trips around the latest gallery exhibits. That's all to say, our relationships influence who we are, what we do, and also and less discussed, how and what we create.I was a firm believer in the tortured artist method of writing; the Hemingway, Gatsby-esque, gin-filled 20s anthem of Paris and other European cities taken over by navel-gazing Americans who yearned to be the picture of starving artist reality. I thought that life was for me. It never has been though, as I'm a creature who craves comfort and stability. So while it seems exotic and heady to have tumultuous romantic or familial relationships, try as I might I'm much more settled when I'm settled in a long-term, serious relationship. And like Massimo, that's given me the space to create in a different way in my life.Having a strong relationship, and it doesn't have to be a romantic one, but having a strong relationship and someone we feel we can put our entire life's trust in takes care of one our baser human needs. The need to feel safety and security.I'm going to detour here to briefly talk about Metta, or "Loving Kindness" meditation. It's a technique I learned that offers up four sentiments to someone who have positive feelings for, maybe someone who don't have such positive feelings for, and lastly for yourself. Because self-kindness can be the hardest kind to achieve. Being hard on yourself is a concept I'm familiar with, so stay with me for a moment.There are variations on the meditation, different wordings, yet the underlying tone and meaning remains steadfast.The four general sentiments are:"May you/he/I be safe.""May you/she/I be happy.""May you/he/I be healthy.""May you/she/I know peace."Nice, right? So simple. And yet it covers every gamut of human need in our world. Relationships are the backbone to feeling safe and healthy and at peace. Restlessness while searching for "The One" (or just the right person to be with in that moment in time) or discomfort caused by family avoidances siphon the lifeblood that we need to be at peace. Nurturing our personal relationships and even the ones we have at work and with strangers is important to being a more grounded and content person, and unleashing creativity.Certainly when I have a strong reaction to something let's say a new song or political hoopla that won't die down, certain songs will trigger dance choreography in my head. But I also know that if I didn't have that support at home from my family and my partner, and if I didn't know that my boss at work supports a strong work-life balance, I wouldn't have the courage to take time out to head to the studio and explore and express.Same goes for my writing. Having security in even just one personal relationship makes me, a self-proclaimed scaredy cat/angsthase (that's German for "anxiety bunny"), take more risks. It makes me want to gamble on myself when it comes to writing in this blog, or penning a post for my work blog about employee advocacy. I didn't hype it out and overthink it, I let my fingers flow and our content manager loved the writing. It's one of the most naturally-written, fun pieces I've ever scribed in a professional writing capacity.That's the creative freedom that can come (notice I didn't say it's a guarantee) from strong, highly nurtured relationships. I get it; relationships are hard. With moms, and siblings, with in-laws and friends. People come into our lives and people can leave as abruptly a taxi horn blaring at 6:30am outside your bedroom window. Relationships take work, just like art. Creativity gets sparked by the muses and streets we walk down, colors we glimpse in the park. It's also nurtured through practice and the pursuit of passion.So go ahead and drop the lemon tart. Let go of your fears and try to create something from it, rather than hide away. Follow your dreams and open your heart to the possibilities of love and friendship and amazing adventures. Your creativity will thank you for it.